Friday, October 30, 2009

Does Rain Make People Stupid in Your Neighborhood Too?

Okay, I am going to preface this one by saying two things.
First, I am writing my blog out of order, because Chrissy Costa really DID win the ghetto award (two posts back) and could not get her internet up in enough time to post her blog. So, I guess you could say, um, she is taking a "sick" day from the proverbial online "office."
Secondly, I will also preface today's blog by saying that I have not owned a car in Chicago for over 5 years, and rarely have I driven one (this could be indirectly related to both crashing the cars of the last two people I dated and, even more indirectly related to the fact that another nickname of mine in highschool and college was Crash).

All of those "prefaces" aside, I am just dumbfounded by how drivers in my city get aaaaaaaaaalllllllll jacked up when even one dew drop dances down (alliteration, like that?) to the ground.
Literally, I know for sure on days like today when it is raining hard that I should probably leave the house 6.5 hours earlier for my 12 minute CTA commute because all drivers will be going one centimeter, say every 30 minutes (don't do the math)...and have their noses planted to their windsheilds so closely that there is noooooooooooooo way they can see that they will be stuck in a traffic jam for weeks and that they'd better just call the boss now and let him know that, well, he shouldn't order their Panera box for today's lunch meeting.

Now, you might say, "Well, rain is dangerous..you can do all kinds of things in the rain, Blythe...like hydroplane, or lose control of the vehicle.."
And I would say ..."RIGHT...."

But, then, how do you account for the fact that I live in Chicago, one of the most horrific weather cities in the world, and one, where, wind storms and, say, blizzards haven't stopped people from going 100 miles and hour on the freeway and running over innocent salt pourers in order to get their dunkin donuts before heading to Grandparent's Day at the local preschool?

This doesn't make any sense.

A true enigma.

A 90-year-old woman can snow dive here or go for a 3 mile run in 20 below zero temperatures (80 below with the windchill), yet that same woman is afraid to driver her car or leave the house when there is a mist surfacing on her window---I mean it could be the dreaded RAIN and all.

This confuses me.

In fact, it is one of those questions in life as daunting to me as, say, where does the universe begin and end..and how did something create something when there was nothing, but nothing and something weren't even words yet?

1 comment:

Chrissy Costa said...

Hi Blythe. Sorry for dropping the pink ball. I am staring at my ghetto award as I write this. I especially like the brown bag it came wrapped in. It's all good now and I'm up and running...internet speaking, that is.

I can say I rarely slow down while driving in the rain. I've also wrecked a "few" times in inclimate weather. Mostly because I was speeding past the fools going 5 mph through the dew drops. Guess I showed them.

I don't know, I think most people are dumb. Perhaps I'm critical. Perhaps. But people do dumb shite all the time. It doesn't have to rain in my neighborhood for people to act a fool. A few brisk whiffs of air and the stupidity begins. Add rain, and you've got a sloppy,
dripping-wet, jackass-crack parade. Most people in my neighborhood "drive" bikes, however.

I can't remember ever seeing you drive, but I did witness you parking a Prius. That was the funniest 23 minutes in July.

And I still owe the city of Chicago at least $700 in unpaid tickets for reasons I no longer remember.

90 year-old women should never snow dive. But I admire the ones that do. (What is snow-diving?)And I just used both BUT and AND to start a sentence only to irritate the fifth grade English teachers who may never read this blog.

I wish I could digest dairy...